Clever Facebook Status Quotes

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You remind me of my Chinese friend...Ug Lee
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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Never on schedule, but always on time.
[Clever Facebook Status] [Nas] [Clever Facebook Statuses]

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Better late than never, but never late is better.
[Drake] [Clever Facebook Status] [Clever Facebook Statuses]

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'Are you athletic?' Yes, I surf the Net.
[Unknown] [Funny Facebook Status] [Clever Facebook Status]

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Deleting your Facebook is like running away from home. You're only doing it for attention and you'll be back in a day.
[Unknown] [Funny Facebook Status] [Clever Facebook Status]

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'Are you as bored as I am?' Makes sense even when you read it backwards...
[Unknown] [Funny Facebook Status] [Clever Facebook Status]

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Face your problems don't Facebook your problems.
[Unknown] [Funny Facebook Status] [Clever Facebook Status]

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The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work.
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status] [Clever Facebook Statuses] [Witty Facebook Status]

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Why do banks lock their pens to the desk? If i'm trusting you with my money, dont you think you can trust me with your pen?
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status] [Dont Trust Nobody] [Bankers And Banks]

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Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? They named him "Sum Ting Wong".
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said, 'Parking Fine'
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status] [Driving]

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Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it's called the present.
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status] [Clever Facebook Statuses]

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Before you speak, listen. Before you write, think. Before you spend, earn. Before you invest, investigate. Before you criticize, wait.
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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Grammar is important. For instance, commas save lives: Let's eat grandpa. Lets eat, grandpa.
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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I use Facebook mostly to keep in touch (without leaving the house) with people whom I do not wish the share my cell number with...
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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I love how, in scary movies, the person yells out, "Hello?" As if the bad guy is gonna be like, "Yeah, I'm in the kitchen! Want a sandwich?
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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Wanna hear a joke about my broken pencil? Never Mind, it's pointless...
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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Did you know that "Dammit I'm Mad" spelled backwards is "Dammit I'm Mad?"
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]

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Alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question.
[Unknown] [Clever Facebook Status]